Today, February 24, is my mom's birthday. She would have been 47 today. My mom, Karrie, passed away on March 21, 2003, she suffered from a pulmonary embolus (a blood clot in her lung). For the most part I have moved on with my life, but there are certain days, memories, pictures that cause the wound to open up again. Today is one of those days.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if she were still here, I think that she would be proud of who I have become and what I have accomplished. There are days when life doesn't seem fair, I find myself asking why isn't she here? Why isn't she here to experience this with me or support me when I need some advice or help? But I soon realize that these questions get me nowhere, that they just cause more pain. I just have to remind myself that she is gone and that I need to accept that, but I know that everything will be ok. I may not always have my siblings to look to for comfort or support, but I do have Spencer, who I plan on spending the rest of my life with. I also have some great friends, Jamie and Lindsay, who I can always talk to when I need to vent or get something off my shoulders.
And that is about as emotional and sappy as I get, but it was nice to get that off my shoulders.
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lauren even though your mom is not here on earth with you i know she looks down at you and is proud of you. you have made awesome choices in your life and she FOR SURE knows how hard you have worked to get where you are. You will see her again someday. never close the memory of her because she will always be in your heart and she'll be with you on your wedding day! i love you and im so glad we are friends!
ReplyDeleteFor the short period of time I knew your mom I KNOW she would be very proud of you. Who wouldn't?! I hate that you are having one of those days, but know Lindsay and I are always here for you! You know I will always be here for you if you need anything. I love ya miss lauren!!
ReplyDeleteOh Lauren, thank you for sharing such a sweet post. You are such an amazing girl and I am so sorry to hear about your Mom. Thank you for commenting on my recent post, and I so appreciate your support. I might take you up on that chat :) I hope you know if you ever need anyone to talk to I am here too... It is so hard to lose a parent, but I hope you find comfort in her memory. I am sure your mom is proud of you because you are one of the most genuine people I have ever met. Not to mention, you are going to be such a smart, compassionate nurse!
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